It’s been a while. I’ve had a harder time writing in Cape Town than I thought I would. Mostly because I am still trying to wrap my hands and head and heart around this place. All it’s little corners. It’s idiosyncrasies. It’s people. It, itself. It’s a story I want to get right.
But I don’t know if I will. Ever, really. Which is scarily wonderful if you think about it. The not-knowing, the realizing that you don’t know it all and that there’s still so much more to learn, every. single. day. That’s Cape Town for me, right now. My dad used to say growing up that there are the people who don’t know and then there are the people who don’t even know they don’t know – and that part of life was being humble enough to be in the first group, not the second one. I think he was on to something there.
So for now, friends, just some pictures from my life, lately. This weekend – and really a lot of these last few days I’ve found myself thinking when my head hits the pillow at night, well, that was a day really well lived. Like a day that left me full. Satisfied. Well-loved. I like those kinds of days. Those weekends that can take me from minibus-ing down Strand Street (a “cultural experience,” if you’ve ever had one) en route to a market all the way to the top of lion’s head for sunset to a boat headed to Robben’s Island to visit a moment in time, a place in history, a reminder of how far we can walk, if only we dare to.
This weekend there were conversations over a grill because we couldn’t start a fire, walks in silence that gave me enough room to breathe for a while (& friends that let me), and waters so blue I could see the sun twinkle in its midst. This weekend I watched two guys rap fireside. I heard from a man who served in prison because he wanted his people to be free. I broke fast with my friend and heard the adhan at the dinner table. I learned the beauty of silence anew, of speaking not just to speak but only when you need to. Really need to. Of the deliciousness of madeleines and how much I need a good swing ride every once in a while. Of friendship in all it’s depths and intricacies. And of the simple need in all of us to be wanted, needed, missed, loved.
These days, they’ve been full. My heart is happy here, where there is always noise but silence when you need it, where there are people who give hugs that knock me over with their warmth, and friends who make me laugh, let me crash in their rooms, who share their jams, who let me dance.
Till next time, Cape Town. Happy start-to-your-week, friends!
we walk a thousand steps, in the wrong direction. broken and bruised, wearing tattered shoes asking a thousand questions. but we go on. trying to get back home.
through the struggles and the troubles, i know we don’t walk alone.
send an army of angels, to make us brave.
keep us strong, and unafraid.
god, keep us safe.